


The Dia Man and The Cheddar Cheese Girl

by nerdybunny222



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grocery Store, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, F/M, Fluff, Meet-Cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 13:35:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17447978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdybunny222/pseuds/nerdybunny222
Summary: Lily's doing grate, but she could be doing cheddar. She just wants some cheddar cheese and doesn't think that's too much to ask.





	The Dia Man and The Cheddar Cheese Girl

**Author's Note:**

> Gratuitous mentions of cheese and Spanish grocery stores.  
> This is my first fic and a huge thank you goes to @season-ofthe-bitch for the handholding, the grammaring, and for saying the ridiculous things that inspired this little fic.

Emental. Brie. Camembert. Tierno de Cabra. Curado. 

Lily’s shoulders slump as she scans the cheese section in the Dia down the street from her apartment. She’s exhausted. The kids at school have infected her with their germs for three weeks now, and it’s been raining in Madrid for just as long. All she wants is a nice, melty grilled cheese sandwich, and honestly, Lily doesn’t think that it should be too much to ask.  

“Who do I have to fuck in this god forsaken country to buy some cheddar cheese?” Lily mutters to herself. 

She probably shouldn’t be talking as loudly as she is, but Spaniards generally don’t pay her any attention, or they don’t understand her. So fuck it, or fuck them, or whatever. She’d do anything to get some goddamn cheddar cheese. She doesn’t care who knows. 

Either way Lily has probably gotten too comfortable thinking out loud in English.

A choking noise coming from the end of the aisle drags her eyes away from the cheese, and maybe she should care a little. 

The source is a very handsome, tall man doing a fantastic impression of a statue. He has the most incredible hair that Lily has ever seen--wild darks curls seemingly defying gravity. She doesn’t know this man, but her fingers ache to touch his hair. His glasses are rounded like the ones Lily pretends she doesn’t need for reading. They look much better on him though. On Lily, she looks like a third grader. But on this man, they frame his face perfectly, their roundness contrasting with his strong jawline and their warm tones perfectly complement his dark skin.

He’s turned towards her with his arm bent at the waist. Clutched in his hand is a liter tub of greek yogurt (the same kind that Lily likes) raised towards her like some kind of strange offering. 

Lily gives him a tight smile and returns to glaring at the cheese section, not to be distracted from her mission by handsome men with incredible hair. Maybe if she stares hard enough she can will some cheddar cheese into existence. She narrows her eyes at the colorful packaging, thinking only of good, melty, cheddar cheese. She can almost taste it.

Nope. Nothing. 

It was worth a try. Lily throws one more scowl at the cheese and digs into her back pocket for her list. It had once included things other than cheese, but is now so smudged and crumpled that it is no longer legible. Lily grabs the handle of her rolly basket and starts slowly walking, still squinting at her list. 

She turns the corner and smacks into something—or more accurately— _ someone  _ solid. Excellent, her quest for wine has knocked the cute guy onto the floor.

“Shit. Perdón. Fuck. I’m so sorry!”

Lily drops everything she’s holding—her useless list, her phone, her dignity. She flaps her hands frantically near his upper arms, before her brain sends them the message to Stop doing that and help him up. 

“It’s no problem,” he says in the most beautiful deep voice Lily has ever heard, as he takes one of her hands in his much larger one and levers himself off the ground. His grip is warm and strong, and Lily almost melts into the floor. Because she is embarrassed. That’s the only reason. 

“I am so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

“It’s fine, really.” He crouches back down to pick up her phone and her bag, which somehow also ended up on the floor, and lastly her now completely crumpled list. He straightens it out and hands it back to her with a raised eyebrow. “So cheddar cheese huh?”

“Yeah, uh well, I take my cheese very seriously,” Lily says, “and you can’t get a decent grilled cheese anywhere in Madrid, and I was really craving a good one and some tomato soup, but I’d already given up on the tomato soup so... I was still hoping I’d be able to find some melty cheese, ya know? And well, desperate times, as they say–” flustered and embarrassed, Lily finally cuts herself off with a shrug. 

Smooth, Evans.

“Desperate times,” he repeats and shakes his head, a small smile flickering at the corner of his mouth. He transfers the rest of her belongings to her arms. She clutches them awkwardly to her chest and watches him run a hand through his hair and ruffle up the back. It looks so soft that she wants to be covered in it. She wants to be the hand running through his hair. Not have her hands run through his hair, which would also be incredibly nice. No. She wants to be the actual hand in his hair.

That’s not weird right?

His eyes trace her face like he’s trying to figure something out, his brows drawn together in endearing contemplation.

He’s mostly likely coming to the conclusion that Lily is crazy. Which, well, she is. But he’s not supposed to know that. Best to get out before she starts saying some of those crazy thoughts out loud.

“Well, uh thanks,” Lily says, gesturing with her things in an ineffectual shrug. She shifts as much as she can to one arm and quickly reaches around him for a bottle of wine from the bottom shelf, before leaving him standing in the middle of the aisle.

********

The next morning finds Lily running out of her flat and down her street as fast as she can. She is going to be so late for school, which at this point she probably shouldn’t care about, but she does. Even though all of the teachers are always as late or later than she is. It’s the principle of the thing.

The light turns just as Lily reaches the crosswalk and she almost makes a break for it, but at this time in the morning there are too many cars for risking her life to even be an option. She bounces up and down on her toes quickly, garnering harassed looks from the other pedestrians.

Finally, the light changes and Lily darts through the slow-moving commuters. How Spaniards move so slowly, Lily will never understand. She feels like a video game character as she bobs and weaves and dodges through the crowd. She awards herself a point at each obstacle she passes. The upbeat music blasting through her headphones cheering her on.

Lily turns sharply onto the Calle Toledo and her streak is broken. She’s sprawled on the ground before she realizes what’s happening. The lights from the unopened Dia flicker in time with her music. A mockery of the excited energy she’d felt not a minute ago.

She rips out her headphones a little more forcefully than she intends, and turns a glare on the shadow looming above her. Prepared to yell, even from her position on the ground, Lily’s words catch in her throat when she realizes it’s the man from yesterday. The man she nearly prostituted herself to for a slice of cheddar cheese.

Her mouth hangs open slightly at the sight of him. Too tall and much too handsome for the hour and the caffeine she has yet to have, she cranes her neck to look up at his face. Concern creases his brow and clouds his eyes, his hand ruffles the back of his hair nervously.

Adorable. The asshole.

“I’m so sorry,” he says in that rich, deep voice, and offers her a hand. She almost doesn’t take it, the memory of his warm grasp from yesterday too fresh in her mind. But she doesn’t want to be rude, so she takes it and does not imagine what it would feel like to have his strong hands all over her.

Lily drops his hand quickly, determinedly dusting off his skirt and trying not to look him in the eye. “Don’t worry about it,” she says, “fairs fair right?”

“Sorry?”

“Yeah you know, yesterday,” Lily says, realizing for the first time that he might not recognize her. “When I barreled you down in front of the wine?” She gestures at the closed doors of the Dia, and wishes that she were still in bed and not continuing to embarrass herself in front of this man.

He nods and looks at her seriously. “Well you see, I’m in the revenge business,” he says. “Knock me over inside the Dia, I’ll run you down out front. Any Dia in the city. I’ll be there.”

Lily shakes her head and smiles up at him, feeling relieved and grateful that he remembers her and doesn’t hate her. “My mistake. I should have known who I was dealing with,” she says.

“The Dia Man, that’s me,” he says, still impressively serious, though now that she knows to look for it she does see a smile around his eyes. “Out to avenge the innocent victims of reckless shoppers.”

He puts his hands on his hips and puffs up his chest, staring dramatically into the middle distance. Lily can almost see a superhero cape with a large yellow ‘DM’ billowing behind him in the morning breeze.

“You should have business cards made.”

“Oh. I did.”

“Good,” she shakes her head, and when she looks back up at him he’s smiling at her and it’s dazzling. It’s wide and bright and a little bit crooked, with a barely-there dimple on the right side. It crinkles the corners of his eyes as they travel over her face. No longer mischievous, but something else entirely. Lily swallows slowly, “that’s good.”

A buzzing from her pocket startles Lily, and she almost drops her bag in her haste to turn off her: “if you don’t leave right now you’ll be so late to work alarm.”

“Shit. I’m so sorry, I gotta go,” Lily says and looks back up at him.

“Maybe I’ll run into you later.”

Lily adjusts her bag more securely on her shoulder and rushes past him.

The Dia Man, she glances over her shoulder to see him watching her. Lily smiles to herself, maybe he will.

********

A day later Lily has to go back to the Dia, because as much as she would like to, she can’t just survive on white wine, and she didn’t buy any food when she went the other day.

She realizes she needs food 30 minutes before it’s closing, so she’s wearing clothes that would definitely get her disowned if her mother could see her. Her hair is unwashed and hangs limply around her face and there is an angry, red zit coming in on her chin. She pulls the hood up of her well-loved and well-worn velour sweatshirt, and rushes inside.

At least this time her list is written on actual paper.

Lily grabs a basket from the pile next to the door and takes the escalator upstairs. She walks quickly through aisles, grabbing her favorite snacks and instant meals. All that’s left is cheese and wine, so she tucks her basket under one arm and quickly makes her way downstairs.

Just as she puts her basket back down a head of wild curls catches her eye. The Dia man is standing just where she stood the other day, examining the cheese almost as intently. Lily is frozen, halfway to the ground, one might say panicked. She could hide in another aisle until he’s gone. But the store isn’t that big and it’s almost closing time, and she can’t leave without her cheese.

So she does the only thing she can do.  She takes a deep breath, stands up straight, re-adjusts her hood. Cursing the Dia gods for putting her in this position, she walks right up next to him.

“Dia Man,” Lily says with one of those nods she’s seen cool men do. Then she looks at the cheese, and not at all at his very long legs in his very nice jeans. 

“Cheddar Cheese Girl!”

“Apparently that’s me,” Lily sighs. There still isn’t any cheddar cheese. Which disappoints her, even though she’s not surprised.

She forces herself to look away, and finds that he’s smiling at her warmly. Lily can’t help but smile back. She feels like a mess, and really needs to finish shopping so she can actually feed herself. But this man is smiling at her, and it brings out the small dimple on the right side of his face, and he has a little bit of stubble on his chin, and well, maybe the Dia gods aren’t so bad after all.

“Avenge any innocent shoppers?” She asks.

“No,” he says, “but there’s still time yet.”

“I’ll have to be extra careful then.”

Lily takes a few packages of cheese off the shelf and drops them into her basket, the contents of which are in direct contrast to the fruits and vegetables filling the Dia Man’s. He seems to come to the same conclusion, his eyes going wide at the third bag of cheese.

“I hate cooking,” Lily offers in explanation. She rolls her basket around the corner, and smiles when she hears him following.

“But, you can’t just eat cheese and wine.” He sounds pained. Lily almost feels sorry for him.

“You sound like my mother,” she says over her shoulder, using the tongs to place three of her favorite pastry: la trenza de nueces, into a paper bag.

“Well she’s right.” He’s apparently forgotten about his shopping, as his basket sits lonely in the middle of the aisle. Lily grabs it and awkwardly maneuvers both baskets through the thin aisles to the checkout line.

“I do fine,” she says, handing him the handle of his basket, “I eat out a lot, the food is so cheap here. So I mostly need things for breakfast and snacks. And wine. That’s incredibly important.”

He takes the handle absently. “That is only slightly better,” concern still coloring his voice.

“I’m fine, really.” She pats his arm, and walks up to the next open register. She smiles at the cashier and loads up the conveyor belt, pays and puts in all in her canvas bag.

“Hasta luego,” she says and takes her receipt.

“Wait,” she hears as she’s about to cross the street. The Dia Man is running after her shaking a piece of paper in his hand. “You forgot something!”

Lily stops and checks her bag for her phone, wallet, and keys. It doesn’t seem like she’s missing anything.

“I did?”

“Yeah,” he says, catching up to her. He hands his receipt, on which he’s written “The Dia Man” and his phone number.

“I thought you’d had cards made?” She smiles at him.

He shrugs. “My name’s actually James.”

“James,” she repeats, “I’m Lily. Nice to meet you.”

********

“And then! My student told me I was cool because I was wearing shiny shoes, which you know I am so… and I’ve lost you.”

James has stopped walking completely, and is staring up at the sign of the newly reopened Dia. A few weeks ago, when the Dia had closed for construction, before Lily and James had known that it would reopen. James had been distraught. “I can’t be expected to go to Lidl,” he had said. “That’s just ridiculous.” And while Lily agreed that Dia was the superior supermarket, she would have adapted to Lidl and moved on.

So when James had pounded the door to Lily’s flat this afternoon, and announced breathlessly that the Dia had in fact reopened, she had allowed him to drag her down the stairs and onto the street.

Lily now realizes that her half hearted attempt to tell him about her day is going to have to wait until they are done food shopping. She pushes his shoulder softly to get him to move, and James looks at her almost flabbergasted and then back at the entrance to the store.

“Go on then,” she says, granting him the permission he apparently needs to rush inside. Lily follows at a much more reasonable pace. Grabbing one of the new baskets that James excitedly points out, but forgets to take.

Lily slowly makes her way through the aisles on the first floor, hearing James’ enthusiastic observations along the way. It really is much nicer than it had been. The floor is cleaner and the displays more appealing. Lily won’t admit it, but James was right. This is much better than Lidl.

She is examining the fruit when she hears James shout: “LILY” from the redone dairy aisle.

She enters the aisle to find James bouncing on the balls of his feet, barely containing his excitement. He doesn’t look away from the cheese until she’s standing next to him.

“Yes?”

In lieu of a response, James points to a brightly colored package at Lily’s eye level. It’s as if it’s been illuminated from the heavens. Standing out among the cheeses is none other than a package of cheddar cheese.

She turns to find James looking at her with the most radiant smile she’s ever seen, and Lily finds that she’s mirroring it instantly.

“I guess I was who you had to fuck to get some cheddar cheese.”

Lily smack his arm, but smiles at him despite herself.

“Yeah I guess you were.”

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [tumblr!](https://nerdybunny222.tumblr.com)


End file.
